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Today was transfer day. I woke feeling pretty positive if not a little worried about the defrost. A nurse arrived at my house to give me my intralipids in the morning which all went very smoothly.A blend of soya bean oil, egg yolk, glycerin and water, they are supposed to inhibit the natural killer cells that may possibly attack embryos. I’ve previously been found to have slightly elevated NK levels but now I lean more to the belief that all my miscarriages were chromosome related (I know for a fact one was) and I’m not sure how much I agree with the NK cells theory. Dr Robert Winstone the eminent and outspoken fertility guru certainly doesn’t believe. However, if you read Dr Beer’s book Is your body baby friendly? he makes an eloquent argument in support.

Onward to the clinic. As we exited the tube they were frantically phoning me – apparently we were supposed to be there at 12 but I’d definitely been told 12.45 (I checked). Luckily this meant straight to transfer as my bladder was bursting! In fact it was so full they made me fill a cup with pee. Literally – I had to measure it.

Good news. Both our good quality embryos had defrosted well.. One was now a hatching blastocyst and the other one hadn’t yet hatched but was looking good. They had given it a bit of a hand by making a hole in the outer layer – assisted hatching. I hadn’t actually requested this but let it go. The embryologist said we had an excellent chance with these two and that now technology had done as much as it could it was up to nature – no pressure body! She also said the chance of twins with two good quality genetically normal embryos was high.

However, the transfer was far from smooth. I have a tilted uterus and scratches etc are awkward. But I’ve never had a problem with transfer, and I’ve had 5 by 3 different consultants. My new consultant always makes a big thing about my tilt. Today he took a while to get the clamp in place but then couldn’t get the catheter through. It was quite painful. I tried to stay calm and not tense up. After maybe 10 mins, though it felt longer, he did the transfer. Afterwards he said it was a difficult transfer. when I asked if this would impact on my chances he said not, and that the actual transfer only took about 20 seconds.

But I thought I’d heard differently so I did the thing I said I wouldn’t do – I googled! Now I’m worried. Dr Google does indeed suggest it may impact on the outcome particularly if the transfer resulted in contact with the endometrial surface as this can cause contraction resulting in ejection of the embryo from the uterine cavity. I’ve had some period like pain since which worries me – though it’s possible this may be the progesterone kicking in. I also had a very small amount of blood – I’m hoping it’s just from the clamp. Because of my concerns I’ve emailed my consultant. I’m a bit annoyed with him – I don’t understand how 3 other consultants have done 5 very straightforward  transfers and he found it so hard. It’s so upsetting to think this could impact our chances.

I’m trying to stay calm but I can’t help feel that we went from a very high chance of success to a much lower one in the course of just 10 mins.

I hope I can get myself into a more positive place for the coming 11 days! I just have to focus on the fact we had 2 normal good quality embryos transferred.